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Sunday, 6 January 2013

The Premises - Cafe Review

I was wandering around the Internet a few weeks ago and discovered a thing of great interest - How to detect serial killers!


And did you know that "Tactical Bacon" exists?  It does!

I also found a cafe called The Premsies!

The name is rather imposing really.  The Premises.  That is to say, the singular item that is a building with land, or simply "a place".  There are no other places, nor indeed buildings.  This is the single place of which all others are merely part.  The Earth, the Seas, all are mere subjects of this singular premises.  It is with the stage set thus that I entered.

Look at this picture.  Gaze ye upon it!


Looking at that picture, I still don't know what I actually ate, but damned if it wasn't utterly lascivious.  From memory it was sardines, beans, capers, egg, and I think some kind of onion.  But whatever it is, it is a solid way to begin a day.

"Next!" he proclaimed boldly.


French Toast, with bacon.  And strawberries, and rhubarb, and other stuff.  It was done right!

Look closely at that bacon.  If you are in a quiet enough room you can hear it calling for you, spirits in the ether, singing.

It is necessary at this juncture to discuss the coffee.  I'm afraid my vocabulary vis-a-vis coffee is rather wanting.  I know there are coffees from places, or origins, and drips and pours and so on but I'm not entirely certain what they all are.  This place has kinds of coffee - which is to say plural, more than one kind, a fact of which I approve.  The kinds I have sampled were most pleasing.  That is to say, good.

The place does have idiosyncrasies.  They have no facility for the scrambling of eggs, nor provisions for furnishing mushrooms.  I don't understand, but then I struggle to heat up baked beans so I'll refrain from judgement.  Perhaps it is a subtle statement of some kind.

They also have some nice fresh juices.  From the local market, Moonee Ponds I believe, or Melbourne, or Belgium... I forget.  Not freshly squeezed on site but still each morning, and quite pleasing.

One must venture forth to this place - no, "Premises" and experience it for one's self.

The Premises on Urbanspoon

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